OF BUREAUCRACIES AND BOSSES: HOW TO BE A NON-CONFORMIST

Plus how to REBEL AGAINST AUTHORITY

How do I write this without getting judged?

I have been in 3 different relationships with 3 men that I completely hated.

Just thinking about those men makes me feel sick because all three relationships failed due to their issues, not mine.

You’re probably thinking that I’m being self-righteous, but it doesn’t matter what you think, you are not the one writing this story.

I’ll return to my ex-boyfriends’ stories later. For now, let’s focus on this part of the story.

I have a question for you: If you were allowed to give a TED talk, what would you speak on?

For me, it would be “How to be Rebellious Against Authority”

But now that I’m writing it here, it sounds controversial and TEDx will probably not want to have me.

So I’ll rephrase it: “How to be a Non-Conformist”.

I realized a little later in my 30+ years on earth that I do not like authority, that I am rebellious, that I’m a non-conformist, and that I’d stand up against any ‘boss’ that refuses to receive sense in this life.

This story is not really about horrible bosses or toxic workplaces, although I’ve written something about that and you can read it in The Dangers of Cabalism.

My Bible school rebellion

I recently graduated from Bible school.

One day during our lunch break, the class administrator came in and told us to tear out a sheet of paper for a surprise test.

Of course, it’s a Bible school and tests are mandatory. But there were 2 problems here:

1- He wanted us to write an impromptu test

2- He was going to use our lunch break to write an impromptu test

Is there anything wrong with writing impromptu tests? Absolutely not.

Is there anything wrong with writing tests during lunch break? Maybe.

However, the issue was that during our induction, we were promised uninterrupted lunch breaks and that we would write tests on Thursdays after lunch (it was a two-week course).

So why then were they suddenly going back on their promises?

I couldn’t wrap my head around it, so I asked the class admin why things were suddenly changing.

But before he could even open his mouth to explain, my fellow Bible school students shouted “Let’s just take it like that”, “stop asking questions” “ Let’s just write it and forget about it”

I got up, turned around, and told my classmates: “Guys, it is important that we ask questions and seek clarity in all that we do as Christians. Coming to a Bible school is not just to learn religious practices, it’s also to learn how to develop influence…”

I can’t remember the rest of the things I said, but it was something along the lines of taking dominion, I even quoted a few Bible passages.

As Christians, we are meant to be the leaders of the world order.

We are created to dominate and lead in every capacity.

We must ask questions, we must seek clarity, we must understand and seek to be understood.

I told the class admin that I would, of course, take the tests, and then proceeded to ask if he would be kind enough to give us prior notice next time.

He agreed, and the following week, he gave us a 2-day notice.

I’m a Christian, and everything I do revolves around my faith, but it is such a pity to see that some Christians will suspend their brains to follow religious practices.

They do not take after the Berean Christians, who the Bible said, would quietly listen attentively to the teachings of the apostle Paul and would go back to the scriptures to ascertain the truth of what was taught. Acts 17:10-11.

Another situation I encountered in Bible school was using the Bible app on my phone.

My lecturers were men of God who were not only sound in the word but were phenomenal teachers who delivered their courses powerfully.

However, they were not comfortable with the fact that I was reading the scriptures from my phone.

Here’s the thing, I have a physical Bible and it’s for personal study.

If you took a look at my Bible, you’d see that it has markings of many kinds on it. I use it for deep, personal study

.

It is also big and cannot be moved around with the small bags we girls carry around these days.

Using the Bible app on my phone benefited me in three significant ways:

1- It ensured my prompt opening of the scriptures when we needed to read them out

2- I was able to read in any version that the lecturers wanted

3- I could highlight and make notes beside it as often as I wanted to

One lecturer (the man who initially condemned it) could attest that my quick access to verses using the app helped his class run more smoothly.

But that wasn't the only issue. I was also taking notes on my phone, which made some lecturers think I was chatting during class.

One lecturer commented on it, and I replied, "Sir, taking notes on my phone helps me write faster, allowing me to keep up with your fast dictation and never miss anything."

I also told him that as I was writing them on my phone, they were going into the cloud where they’d be stored forever (or for as long as the cloud technology lives) and I would never misplace them.

Moreover, I planned to do a post-class study of the courses where I’d transfer them to a physical notebook.

He looked at me, smiled, shook his head and continued teaching.

I heard some of my classmates murmur to each other, and I grinned as I continued to write.

Bible school is meant to grow your spiritual understanding—agreed.

Bible school is not meant to grow your intellectual capacity—STRONGLY DISAGREE.

Back to my relationships

I've always been someone who expresses her opinions.

Among all the guys I've dated, one was particularly interesting.

He would gist me of how he ended things with his ex because she was too opinionated.

Guess what? Some of the 'character flaws' he accused her of were habits I was proud of in myself.

He said she would sometimes question his decisions and wouldn't agree with them unless she had a clear picture of their outcomes.

*Laughs in Swahili*

Brother ex, that’s exactly who I am.

When I asked him how they ended things, he said “I just stopped picking up her calls”

*Laughing in Yoruba*

I picked race from that relationship, this particular race was to the swift.

All the boys I have dated, save for current relationship, were men who believed that the place of a woman was in solitary confinement and compulsory consent.

That wasn’t going to work for me. The Bible says I’m a help-meet, not a silent partner.

The University non-teaching staff from hell

In my undergraduate days, I was quite a rebellious kid.

I was selectively rebellious, in the sense that I never had any altercations with my lecturers, but you see those non-teaching staff that call themselves department secretaries and co? We had one too many.

If you are schooled in any university in Nigeria, you’d agree with me that 100-level days are usually the roughest period of university life.

This is because, you were required to start and complete registrations before exams started while also struggling with your accommodation, and trying not to miss lectures.

You’re lucky if you have a sibling or a friend who has already passed through the process and could guide you.

But those who didn’t have to figure things out on their own.

I believe it's common sense that new students, or Jambites, have no idea what to do when they come for registration, so it's your responsibility as a department secretary or anyone who works in registration to explain things to them.

Once, I went into their offices to handle some registration—I can’t remember what it was for.

As I entered with other students, a woman yelled at us to get out. We hurried out, and she slammed the door behind us.

We gathered by the window, peering in, when a man came over and closed the curtains.

I could hear them speaking in Yoruba, hurling insults at us, saying we were disturbing their peace. They continued to chat idly afterwards.

Without completing that specific registration in their office, we couldn’t move on to the next step, and lectures had already started.

After a while, I got tired of waiting, so I opened the door and stepped inside.

As soon as I entered, they turned to hurl more insults, but I calmly said something along the lines of, "Sir, ma'am, during our orientation, the vice chancellor told us that as 100-level students, we are allowed to walk into any office to ask questions about our registration."

Our VC did say this, and he gave us a portal to log into to report any office that didn’t do what was required.

After I said it, other students who were already crowding behind me chorused “Yes, it’s true”

One by one, the non-teaching staff members left the table where they had been gossiping, returned to their desks, and began attending to us.

They did this grudgingly, of course, snatching our files and muttering under their breath.

One woman even insulted me, calling me rude, but the bottom line was that I got it done—along with many others.

There are so many stories of my non-conformity, but I don’t want this newsletter to be too long so I’d end it here.

The next time someone tries to dim your shine, remind them you’re a non-conformist. And if someone advises you to be less rebellious, point them to Genesis 1:28.

And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on earth”

- Genesis 1:28

This means we are meant to have authority over every situation—physical, emotional, mental, financial, intellectual, and spiritual.